Thursday, September 17, 2009


The other day, as I was packing up the babies into the car after a walk, I saw this woman that looked so familiar getting out of her car. For a while, I couldn't place her. She had a baby, but just the one, so I knew she wasn't in my twin moms group. Then, it dawned on me that she was one of the moms "living" in the NICU when Sebastian and Collette were in the hospital. I wasn't 100% sure it was her, not fully trusting my sleep deprived, post-partum memory but asked her how old her baby was, to see if it made sense. Turns out, her baby is now almost a year old, after spending 2 months in the Special Care Nursery. At the time, I didn't realize how long that little baby girl had been there but now it makes sense, remembering how well her mom knew the nurses.

We chatted for a bit, got to see each others babies, big and strong and nothing like the premature little newborns they once were. She asked me if I was going to the NICU reunion, which I had totally spaced on. It's this Sunday and I figured, what are the odds that after all this time I would bump into her this week? I guess that means I should go. I have a bunch of preemie clothes to return to them anyway and it will be nice to see some of the nurses that cared so well for our little ones.

After seeing her, it got me remembering our time in the hospital - short, in comparison, but to us it felt like an eternity. Collette was in the hospital for 12 days, Sebastian 13. To this day, that NICU time has really impacted me as a mother. I get very anxious and stressed when the babies do not finish their bottle/food. There was a time when this was reasonable, like when they weighed 5 lbs and were yet to make it on the growth chart. Now, however, its just insane. Collette weighs over 21 lbs! Big deal if she doesn't finish her bottle. I'm getting better about it but there are times where I get so worked up and frustrated that I have talk myself out it, because those days are long gone now. Its like PTSD, I swear. Their NICU time also made me a bit of a schedule fanatic, but that has been a blessing and a lifesaver and I am so thankful to those nurses for getting us off to a good start.

Of course, I do have other hang ups and regrets about their NICU time that I have alluded to in the past but don't want to get into here. Mostly just about their approach to fattening up babies and how that lead to no BFing for us (and my aforementioned PTSD vis a vis feeding). But all in all, it was not a horrible experience (as I dreamed it would be before I had the twins) and I'll be happy to show off my almost 10 month olds at the reunion this weekend. Since my camera still isn't connecting to my computer, here is photo of the twins from their hospital days - this is the very first one of them together, so its near and dear to me.


  1. oh my gosh they were just so little! i remember it like it was yesterday =) And now they're So Big and this auntie is So Proud!

  2. You forget how little they once were. They are so big now! You really need to fix that camera...i love seeing their pics

  3. NICU time is so tough! Every time I see a sick child, I think of the time that Eva Rose and Thomas we in for RSV and I cry. Like you said though, my little ones are not so little anymore but even though they have grown and have had no negative impacts, it's till tough. Your guys have gotten so big and they are even more adorable now. I wish there was a reunion at Childrens'. I would love to show off how big my guys are and say thanks to the nurses again!

  4. Oh! What a sweet, sweet picture :)

    NICU time was definitely rough. I'm always grateful that our hospital had a mom's room for moms to "check into" after being discharged from the hospital. I could come and go as I pleased but still had a semi-private room to retreat to and sleep in if I wanted.

    How cool is it that your hospital has reunions!!

  5. Definitely, had a kid in NICU is the hardest experience for any parent.

    Have a nice weekend.

  6. The NICU PTSD and your ingrained reactions as a result fades with time. My 30 weekers spent 6 weeks in the NICU and at almost 4, I've been able to leave behind most of the hangups. Sure, some things still stress me out, but I chalk most of them up to just plain old motherhood these days.


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