We put the p-o-o in pool

Saturday was Auntie Kim's annual summer cookout and Wiffle ball tournament for which we made the trek out to Grafton, about an hour's drive. (For us, that's a lot.) We were expecting record heat that day (over 100 F) so my sister's neighbors were kind enough to offer up their pool to those of us bringing little ones. They have 4 kids of their own so adding a few more to the mix is no big deal.

After having some snacks and playing a bit inside, Auntie Stacey and I got the kids dressed in their suits and headed over to the pool. None of the kids know how to swim so we have to hold them the whole time we are in the water, even with their life vests on. After being in the pool for about half an hour, Collette said the P-word. Normally, this would not be alarming. She is potty trained and gives ample warning when she needs to use the bathroom, especially where poop is concerned.  However...she has been on a potty strike, of sorts.  She now refuses to go to the bathroom anywhere outside of home.  Even if a I have a potty ring (just like the one at home) and put it on someone else's toilet, she screams and cries and kicks and just. won't. go.

So, when she said "poo poo," I bolted out of that pool, knowing that she must be pretty desperate if she's willing to go when we're not at home.  As I was running upstairs, cradling Collette, to the bathroom, I realized there was already a bulge in Collette's bathing suit.  I was too late!  Once we were in the bathroom, it didn't take me long to realize that she was done pooping and it was now trapped in her bathing suit.  This was a low moment in parenting for me, to date.  Getting the poop into the toilet and trying my damnedest to not get any on my hands or all over my sister's bathroom was nearly impossible.  Meanwhile, Collette was crying that she wanted to go home to poop (a little late for that!!) and fighting my every move to get her de-pooped.

I somehow managed to get her clean and not ruin my sister's bathroom in the process.  She was still crying, though.  Traumatized, no doubt.  Then, I looked out the window, which faces the aforementioned pool.  And I see everyone evacuating.  And I know it can only mean one thing.  Poop in the pool.  To say I was mortified is an understatement.  I wanted to curl up into a little ball and just die of embarrassment.  Alas, I am a grown up and we grown ups have to face these things.  I changed Collette into her dry clothes and headed over to the neighbor's yard, my head hung in shame.

I climbed up to the pool deck to assess the damage.  And there, right in the middle of the pool, was a fairly large poop.  And it wasn't a floater, because that would be too easy.  No, it was a sinker and it was sitting at the bottom of the pool, mocking me.  My brother was there, laughing at me and disgusted with me, simultaneously.  I asked him where Kerry (the owner of the pool) was and what the "plan" was.  Do pool owners have special equipment for such things?  No, they don't.  The plan was to use a pail and the pool cleaner net thingy to dive down to the bottom of the pool and scoop out the poop.  So, Kerry and I put on some kid goggles, each got a pail and net thingy, and took turns diving for poop.  Ya...that really happened. 

Where was this guy when I needed him?!

How was YOUR weekend?!

That Was Easy

With almost a week of potty training under our belts, I think I can safely say that Collette is potty trained. OMG!

Collette, reading her "princesesa" book (People magazine with Kate Middleton on the cover)

I wish I could share with you all the secrets to successful, stress-free potty training. Alas, I have no secrets. I think we just got lucky on this one. After the few accidents she had on Day 1, it clicked. She asks to go when she needs to, with plenty of time to get to the potty, get pants off and get her on the pot. False alarms are far fewer now (although we still have lots). And she is waking up dry from nap and overnight. I know. It's not even fair.

Poop, though - that's another story.

My first day alone with all three post-potty-training was Friday. I got the kids up, Collette went pee in the potty, and then went to the potty again but didn't do anything. So, I figured it was safe for me to sneak downstairs and make a coffee. And naturally, Collette decided that would be the perfect time to poop. In her underwear. I heard her crying/screaming and I knew she'd had an accident. Her pants were FULL of poop and some had even escaped down her pant leg and on to the floor. She was in hysterics. I was just glad the baby hadn't eaten any of the poop. Does that make me a cup half full kind of person, or what? :)

So, number 2 is still an issue. She has only gone twice since we started on Monday - once in her nap time diaper on Wednesday and the aforementioned incident. I have heard from so many moms that this is pretty standard so I'm not going to worry about too much for now. I'll keep you all posted though - I'm sure you'll be dying for Collette's BM updates.

All in all, I have nothing to complain about. This was way easier than I thought it would be. Does this mean it will be hell training Sebastian??? Please don't say yes.

The Potty Gods are already smiting me...

...and I haven't even started using the potties! I was *thinking* about using the potties - I guess that was enough to incur their wrath.

Having heard a million potty stories, from ones about 4 months olds signaling to use the potty to ones about 4 year olds refusing to use it, I decided I should join in on the fun. I figured, maybe if I start early, no pressure, I might be pleasantly surprised and if I wasn't, no harm done because I really don't care yet. So, this afternoon we bought four $5 potties at KMart. Two green, two beige - Sebastian "chose" the beige and Collette therefore ended up with green.

We got home, got settled and I thought now is as good a time as any to put them on the new potties. I brought Collette into the bathroom and told her what we were going to do (like she cared...). Off came the shorts and then the diaper. And there was poop. FML. No wipes in arm's reach - just toilet paper which, let me tell you, is no match for mushed up toddler poop. I wiped her as best I could and put her on the potty (why not!) while I went to find wipes and a diaper. On my way out of the bathroom, I noticed that Sebastian had not only removed his shorts (they're a bit too big) but also his diaper, which he has never before done. And it, too, had poop. And most of that poop and escaped the diaper and was on my kitchen floor. FML again. For those of you keeping score, I now had two diaperless children with poopy bottoms, zero diapers and zero wipes. Oh, and one dog who seemed all too eager to sniff, and maybe even eat, the poop.

All this and we hadn't even really TRIED the potties! Part of me thinks this is a sign that I should stop all thoughts regarding the potty. But a bigger part of me realizes that this is not that crazy a thing to have happen with two toddlers. Plus, we all need a good poop story. And quite frankly, I've heard better. Hopefully, we can try again tomorrow and not get sidetracked by dirty diapers. Wish me luck. Ha!