Sunday, February 20, 2011

Sometimes I forget my "mothering style"

Billy left on Friday for a 15 day business trip to Asia. As luck would have it, the Aunties are also away for the long weekend, living it up in NYC. Usually weekends are family time for us so this weekend was pretty slow, what with no one around.

During the week, when I know I will be alone with my kids around the clock for 4 days, I make a point to be really busy. Especially doing social activities. For me, this is really necessary because I get easily worn out when I don't see and talk to other people. Well, adult people. This is part of my personality type, as outlined by the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. This is the personality test used in a very enlightening parenting book, Mother Styles.

According to Mother Styles, my mothering style is ESTJ. However, I am extremely E, or extroverted. What that means for me as a mother is that being home with kids all day will drain me and adult interaction will give me energy. That's the reason why, even when my kids take a nice long naps, sleep all night and behave like angels (ha!), I will still feel exhausted if I have been all alone for days. Extroverts get their energy from being with (adult) others and that's me to a T.

Being alone all weekend has been really hard for me. It's my own fault - I have known for quite some time that Billy and my sisters would be gone this week and neglected to make any plans. I just forgot how stressed I get when I don't have any grownups to talk to. Friday afternoon was fine. Saturday was OK. This morning, eh. By this evening, I was ready to throw myself off a bridge. The kids weren't being particularly bad. I just had so little patience by that point. And I knew it was me - my "gas tank" was empty.

Tomorrow we're back to our normal routines and hopefully that will help me recharge after a very draining couple days. As for now, early bedtime for mommy. :)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad


  1. I haven't taking the Mothering test but I have a feeling I would chart E as well. It's one of the reasons I have to do activities with Cameron to get out of the house and have adult interaction. It is also why I don't think I would make it as a SAHM....way too hard!!

  2. Hi, really glad you’ve had some no-cry days – I soooo get you. I can deal with all the physical stuff but please stop the crying already!

    On the preschool thing – that year does make a difference in money. I am with you – a total number cruncher J In fact, I need to write a post on my preschool thing.

    Glad you’re remembering your MotherStyle! I love it! I am so the same :)

  3. I hope getting back to your weekday routines is helping. I've only recently begun to crave more adult interaction, but I've definitely had days were I'm ready to pull my hair out because it's just been the three of us all day (or maybe for a couple of days). I wonder what my mothering style is. Where did you find the test?

  4. @reanbean: Here is the link to take the test on Mother

    also, you can find more in-depth tests if you search for Myers-Briggs tests.

  5. Wow. that test was an eye-opener. I mean, it pointed out things I *knew* but didn't really ... realize. (Does that make any sense at all??) heh Hope you're energized by now :)


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